There is no way around it, no matter how adorable your child is, being a mom is not an easy job. When I talk to moms one of the biggest issues they feel isn’t discussed enough, is talking about the unspeakable’s…… the thoughts and frustrations moms feel ashamed to speak out loud about. The troubling thoughts you may have running through your mind aren’t uncommon. Many moms will endure some level of unwanted thoughts at some point.
Truth be told, we all expect moms to perform at 100% 365 days out of the year, with no breaks or time off. When you look at it objectively it seems almost insane that we demand so much of moms daily. Let’s dive right into the various ways that cause what I call the Mommy Blues…
Running On Empty
Have you ever felt as if your gas tank is empty, I’m not talking about your car, but more so your inner-self? A mom’s job is never done, which is why oftentimes, moms are running on an empty. Many moms feel the pressure of balancing home life, a career, and maintaining a marriage, it’s no wonder some moms may need a glass of wine (or two) by the end of the night. The key question is, how do you fill back up your gas tank?
Asking for additional help from your spouse or outside help from family or friends can really help alleviate some of your added stress and help build back your original momentum. The simple act of expressing how you feel to those closest to you can sometimes make a world of difference.
On Separate Wavelengths
A mom’s job is never done, which sometimes dads fail to realize all the work moms do throughout the day to maintain a stable home. I can’t tell you the number of times I’m out shopping or running errands with friends that are moms, who vent to me about how their husbands seem to be on a completely different wavelength than them. It’s not for a better lack of trying, however sometimes dads miss the mark on understanding on what a mom needs.
It all seems to come down to a disconnect in communication, each parent tends to have their own objectives and sometimes they don’t match up. When children come into a marriage, it’s like starting the relationship all over again, with an added person in the mix. With children, comes a new set of priorities and different dynamic to the way things used to be. Adapting to the new roles you play in each other lives will take time to adjust, just remember the foundation you built your relationship on and the trust you have built-in one another.
Remembering your Past Self
Do you find yourself on those long hard days as a mom, thinking about how easy it was before children came into the picture? You would throw on your heels and slip into your fabulous dress and meet your girlfriends for a fun night out without thinking twice about it? The thought can be nauseating on how easy life was before children came into the picture, from fun date nights, all-night parties and carefree days.
The only worry you probably had back then was what to decide on for your plans for the weekend. Though that life may seem like it took place a million years ago, there is nothing wrong with reminiscing about your past life. Our minds are filled with constant thoughts from the past, the good memories you have, leave an imprint in your mind. In times of stress of a challenging day, a past-memory can bring a smile or a laugh to your face. Sometimes in a hectic, crazy day, moms need a good laugh from the past to remind themselves of the feeling of being carefree.